I have quit smoking recently. I did not quit smoking because smoking was “bad” for me. While I was smoking cigarettes I did not have any concerns about health issues and never said that smoking is a bad thing.

Actually I was in the opposite end, claiming that smoking was very good in the

way that it supported me to slow myself down. However my words were not always

reflecting my actual experience of smoking. Most of the time I simply followed

a…

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Physical

work really helped me today to stop the chatter in my mind. I simply had no

energy left to think much. And I began to remember the expression that is

available for me if I let go of the barriers that I have created for myself. I

am not saying that I can see clearly now, but now I realize a bit more the need

for stopping the search for reasons why I am so… Continue

The fear of self exposure is really huge within me. Whatever I do share with other people is precisely calculated within my mind, making sure the presentation is normal and will keep my self image intact. Many thoughts

are about the reader and what he will think about what I present. It is rather

confusing then, when I make a statement that I want to change because obviously

my actions show the contrary. I do, however quite often try to write what…

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new experience, new beginning - clean plate. Here is the responsibility to not fill the space with the same bullshit, not to start another cycle. This responsibility is huge and the decision to stand has to made here, now. Within that making sure no back doors are available in the moments of hard knocks. and there will be many difficult scenarios enfolding in front of and within me, yet I expect and greet them being ready and prepared.



I realize more and more the illusion of existing… Continue

The amount of knowledge=the amount of shit. And don’t get me wrong, shit is rather useful material when it’s applied in the right time and place, the same with knowledge. However, when the knowledge is gathered and

stored within one’s mind only, not applying and testing it in real life, over time it accumulates making more and more logical connections, categories etc – piles and piles of shit with no other use just to show to others how much you are able to stink.…

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